Do We Walk Alone?

I have written a few things about last fall's struggles without the specifics… 

I felt very alone through these struggles because I wasn't able to openly talk about them. I prayed and read the scriptures in an effort to gain strength… but I still felt like I was hanging on by a thin thread… I often wanted to shrink away in a corner and not deal with the pains at hand. I expressed my hurt a couple of times to others, but it seemed like the ears that heard had not really heard me… so my hurt burned deeper.

After several months of reaching deeper for spiritual strength than I really wanted to, I felt the healing begin to take place. I was finally feeling as if I could confidently push away the hurts out of my mind and at least function. Right about that time, when I was feeling stronger, I received multiple phone calls, text messages, and emails from people from all walks of life asking me if I was ok. One sister from church, whom I don't even know, called me out of the blue. She said, "I was praying and felt the distinct impression that I needed to check on you and pray for you. Are you ok?" Another friend said she had felt a strong impression to pray for me for a long time… but on that particular day she felt it was time to reach out to me. Another friend from high school said she couldn't get me off her mind all morning. She just had to find out if everything was ok. Strangers sent me messages of love during this same time period over a couple of days. 

I thanked each of these wonderful people for reaching out with so much love, but I didn't understand why they had received that impression. I was actually doing ok… FINALLY! None of these people had anything in common… except that the Spirit had spoken to them. These messages were undeniably messages directly from God via these lovely souls.

I asked God why they hadn't spoken to me when I was at my lowest. Why didn't this influx of love come at a time when I felt like I wanted to crumble to pieces? I was receiving this influx of love… this absolute knowledge that God was sending me love… AFTER I was actually feeling better. 

Usually you hear stories about people reaching out during the deepest, darkest moments of sadness and hurt. Why now? This troubled me for a bit. I prayed about it a lot. 

A couple months passed and pure joy was returning to my soul as I continued to heal. I was moving in a very positive direction when out-of-the-blue I received a 2nd influx of love. Some were the same people and others were different, but it was a very obvious influx. I knew by the messages that I received. People said over and over again that they felt "inspired" to contact me. 

Again, I was confused. I was actually still doing ok. I'm ALWAYS grateful for messages of love. I just didn't know why there so many random messages in a 24 hour period. That very night, in the middle of the night, I received a very strong impression that there was something wrong again. Shortly after, my fears were confirmed and my sadness returned full force. Just a few short hours after God had sent this influx of love, I was in the midst of another deep trial. 

As I suffered the pains of this trial once again, I asked God why HE was sending such a wave of love right after and right before my deepest sorrows when I actually wanted the constant reassurance DURING the trial. I hadn't found the answer yet…

Soon after, Abe and I were asked to speak at a young single adult conference for the whole state of Florida. There would be several hundred young, single adults in attendance. Guess what the topic was? 

It was titled: "We Never Walk Alone" from a talk our prophet, President Monson, delivered in General Conference in October 2013.  

I cringed, I cried, and I refused to prepare this particular message because I felt like my experience had shown me otherwise. I had felt VERY alone DURING my trial, but I also knew I couldn't back out of this commitment, but how could I speak on not walking alone when I had felt very alone for so many months?  

I knelt down and offered up a very powerful prayer. I knew God had sent love my way, and I knew it was a very deliberate message. I mustered up every bit of courage and humility I had and began to read President Monson's talk again. All of a sudden it hit me very strongly:

A child who is learning to walk receives hugs and cheers and all kinds of encouragement the moment before his mother releases her fingers from his. The father, standing on the other side of that child, waits for him to take those few steps to him. Both the mother and father are there the entire time ready to catch the child and to keep that child from being harmed. The parents make sure that their child is not going to fall into a hole or face any trial that the child can't handle. They gently cheer the child on; but in order to learn, that child has to take those steps on his own. That child has to reach the other side by learning how to walk. The parents are there all along… just waiting… knowing this is a good experience for the child's growth. When the child reaches the father, what happens? Oh my goodness there is an eruption… a very obvious INFLUX of love and hugs and cheers. He did it!!  

As I thought about the timing of my eruption of cheers from God during my trials, they came before and after my deepest trials. My Heavenly Father was there all along, but HE had to let me work through the pain (under HIS watchful eye) in order for me to grow. 

I read the talk from President Monson again. This time I believed his words when he said:

"You will one day stand aside and look at your difficult times, and you will realize that He was always there beside you."

I thanked the Lord for teaching me. As I spoke to the single adults I gave them an object lesson. On the way to the event, I felt inspired to ask our children to sing the song they had performed at a talent show only a month previously. This would be an even larger audience, and they didn't have time to run through it again. The prompting came to me for them to sing, so I knew the Lord would bless them. 

What happens when somebody is about to take the stage and perform? We cheer and give them a huge round of applause. (We give them an influx of love and encouragement.)

Then, they are required to walk out onto that stage and perform on their own. When my young children stood in front of the large audience, I couldn't sing for them. I sat in front of them and smiled at them and prayed for them, but I couldn't do it for them. They had to sing their song.

When a performance is finished, what happens? Of course we give them another huge round of applause. We may even give some whistles and extra shouts. 

When my children finished their performance, they received a standing ovation. Tears streamed down the faces of many in attendance. The biggest cheers come before and after the performance.

We hear the stories of people performing and, unable to finish, the crowd joins in and sings with them. People also often tell their stories of when they suffered greatly through trials and then received much needed relief just in time to save the day.

We rarely hear about the stories when we felt as though we were alone and needed intervention, but the help we thought we needed did not come. 

I testify that we are NOT alone even when we are not receiving the help we THINK we need. God IS beside us ready to keep us safe from those things that would harm us greatly. HE is merely allowing us to stretch and to grow in ways that only that particular experience will allow. HE allows the difficulty of the way because HE knows we are capable… and HE is there ready to give us the greatest influx of love when we come out conquerors in these spiritual battles we all face. I imagine we received a grand influx of that same love before we came to earth.

I shared this experience with the young single adults of Florida, and afterward, there was a line of young men and young women who expressed gratitude because they too now understand that they are ABSOLUTELY not alone. Our challenge is to watch for the moments when God allows us to hear and to feel the moments of love and encouragement that HE is offering along the way… to watch for the influx of love when we have conquered a small obstacle… when we have finished act 1 or act 2 of our grand performance here on earth… for we are on the stage right now giving our best performance… and we do it for HIM. 

Miracles at a Bar

First of all… I'm sorry I haven't written for so long. We have had so many visitors and events for the children I haven't had any time at all. I am making a list of all the things I still want to write about. When will I ever catch up??? :-) I'll just keep trying. :-)

Miracles at a Bar in Jacksonville

Abe is teaching voice lessons to a young girl who was performing at a big competition in Jacksonville last weekend. She asked Jackson to be her drummer. What an experience for these two 13-year olds. They were the youngest performers at the event, and there was some VERY impressive talent there.

There was so much traffic at the competition that we all had to carry all the pieces to Jackson's drum set for almost 4 blocks (without Abe's strong arms because he was out of town).

When we arrived at the first venue, a nut was missing off Jackson's cymbals and the pedal was broken on his hi-hat cymbals. We didn't know what was wrong, but it seemed as if a part was missing. Neither would function properly without those missing parts.

All my children prayed for help, and several of us began retracing our steps back to the van to see if we could find any shiny pieces that could possibly be the parts we were missing.

I found a random nut lying on the sidewalk. I picked it up knowing it wasn't the exact piece that he was missing, but I was hopeful it might help fix something somehow. When I returned to the venue where Jackson was trying so hard to put his pieces together, we were all overjoyed to discover that the random nut fit the cymbal!! What are the chances that it would be an exact fit?!? I knew God had HIS hand in that for sure.

The other, more serious problem was the foot pedal for the hi-hat…

I approached the owner of the establishment for help. We didn't want Jackson to miss this opportunity, and we didn't want his singer to be without her backup drummer. The owner happened to also be a drummer and very generously loaned us his hi-hat foot pedal stand for our first show. We were so grateful for the temporary solution, but I was still worried about Jackson's next show which would be at a different venue. I was also worried about the shows over the following days. (This competition lasted several days.)

Nobody I asked seemed to know the problem with the stand nor the solution.

I sat off to the side and prayed over Jackson's hi-hat stand- pleading for God's help. I asked God to help me figure out how to fix the problem. I said, "Heavenly Father, you helped us to buy this drum set because of thy miracles. Please help us to be able to use it for these very important shows."

The more I tried to fix it, the more I began to feel a bit frustrated that I wasn't receiving any answers from God. As we began to set up for the next venue, which happened to be in a bar, I watched the sound technician racing around connecting wires and cords. I was afraid to ask him for help with our hi-hat stand and foot pedal because he looked so busy… but we truly were desperate.

The sound technician looked at it for 2 seconds and immediately knew the problem: the spring inside was broken, and we would need to buy a new one. A moan began to escape my mouth when he interrupted me and said, "BUT I think I have an extra one that Jackson can have."  He ran to the back and pulled out a really nice, hi-hat foot-pedal and stand. It was of a MUCH higher quality than the one we owned. These nice hi-hat foot pedal stands are VERY expensive!! I couldn't believe he even had an extra of exactly what we needed, and I couldn't believe he was GIVING it to us.

I cried and both Jackson and I thanked him over and over again. He opened his arms and gave us hugs.

I told him I had been praying for a solution but never imagined such a beautiful one.

As we stood in the bar where Jackson would be performing his second show and with people beginning to come in, this kind-hearted sound technician took the time to talk with us about God. He said that lots of people had helped him as a young musician, so he was happy to pass that on. He bore firm testimony that there are no coincidences in this life and that God blesses us with beautiful miracles in our lives at times when we think all is going wrong. What an AWESOME GUY!! Jackson really enjoyed working with him.

I couldn't stop thinking about this experience all week:

I had prayed for God to help me FIX the situation. I actually became a little bit frustrated with God because I felt as if HE wasn't answering my prayers in the way that I thought was best. After I saw the whole picture, I was quite humbled to realize that not only was God answering my prayers, but HE was answering them far better than I had imagined.

The hi-hat stand we now had was far better than anything we could have imagined owning or fixing, and the conversation that Jackson and I had with the sound technician was priceless… It was a moment to remember forever… a moment to forever inspire my young musician.

I am learning to accept and TRUST that God's ways are much better than my ways… and I am grateful for the times when I am able to see that so clearly.

Jackson's 2nd Venue

Jackson's 3rd Venue

An Inspired Gift

My dear friend from Bolivia, Maria Luisa, arrived to our home Tuesday morning at 2:30am. Abe arrived the following morning 1:30am. It has been WONDERFUL to be together.

Maria Luisa has the sweetest, most grateful heart. The following morning, we were racing between activities and all I could gather was peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for lunch. You should have seen her joy at eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for the first time! She has been washing dishes, cleaning my floors, helping me with my garden, and of course loving and teaching my children.  She is such a joy- not because she's doing so many chores around the house- but because she gives so much sincere, gushy love.


The morning after she arrived, I was standing in my kitchen looking at a picture of the Orlando temple, and I said in my heart: "I really wish I had a picture of the Cochabamba, Bolivia temple."

I had the beautiful opportunity to finish my mission just a couple of weeks after the Bolivia temple was dedicated. I helped at the dedication and open house and saw and heard many miracles pertaining to this temple. It was a place that was very dear to my heart.

That night, Maria Luisa opened up her suitcase and brought out several gorgeous, wonderful gifts from Bolivia for each member of our family. She even brought gifts for my parents and for Abe's parents. Her generosity overwhelmed us.

Then she presented a gift that was wrapped. I opened it up and saw the most beautiful representation of the Cochabamba, Bolivia temple made out of wood. The greatest warmth spread through my entire body and tears just poured from my eyes! I can't even express in words how strong the Spirit was throughout my entire body. I had never seen such beautiful workmanship. Maria Luisa's son found it in Bolivia and knew it would mean so much to me even though he is not a member of my church. I had never seen one like it in all my time there!

Maria Luisa's husband was baptized because of that temple. He worked as an engineer on the temple and saw the perfection that was required for even the smallest details that nobody else would have even  known about. As he worked within the walls of the Cochabamba, Bolivia temple, he felt and knew that he was helping to build the Lord's House.

This beautiful representation was a gift from my precious Bolivian family who knew how much I love the temple, and it was also a gift from God.

What a tender mercy from the Lord to know and speak to all of our hearts so perfectly.

God knew I would be receiving that gift. HE put the desire to own a picture of the Cochabamba, Bolivia temple very strongly into my heart just a few hours prior to receiving it. I believe HE did that, so that I would know that this was a gift orchestrated by HIM… a gift that HE had guided my friends to find… a gift that would not only touch my heart but theirs as well.

Skateboarding Mama!

My mother who will be 74-years old next week sent me this email a couple of days ago about her trip to see my brother, his wife and their kids Texas. The email was intended just for me, but I requested permission to share it. Keep in mind we all compare my mother to Lucille Ball.

Here is her story:  

"The day I arrived in El Paso the kids wanted me to go out and watch them skate board.... (well it's your fault, I see picts of your little children doing it so I think.... I'd like to try that... if Rachel's little kids can, surely I can…) 

I can ice skate, roller skate, etc.  I won't do any trick or anything like that... I'll just cruise down the street like they are doing.  So Lauren gives me a skate board!!!  I put one foot on it and as I lift the other, zoom! The thing zooms out from under me and leaves me crashing on the pavement.

I yelped, 'Oh no! my beautiful hip, my beautiful hip!!'  (Not that it was beautiful to look at but it was working beautifully.) 

The children laughed and picked me up.  I was hurt so badly.  

Lauren [her granddaughter] went in and told Bonnie, 'Nanny fell off the skateboard!' 

Bonnie:  'Is she hurt?' 

Lauren:  'I don't think so, she's not crying!'"

(Note from me:  Pause for a moment and remember she is 74- YEARS OLD!! I had to stop to laugh hysterically as I pictured my mother flying in the air! What 74-year old woman tries to skate board? I can't even stay on a skate board!!! Now that's a woman who is truly trying to live every second of her life!! :-))

"We laughed about it and I prayed about 50 times that day hoping that I didn't break my wrist and/or hip.   People my age have that happen with smaller falls than that!  I just couldn't sit for several days very well and stairs were hard but as I continued to move, it helped and I am back in shape now. 

The wrist is what is taking longer to heal.  Mike said he could x-ray, but I felt it wasn't broken... just badly jammed with a palm wound.  Aaron [her grandson] had just had a skate board accident the day before and we had our picture taken sharing our matching hand wounds.  I have to wear a wrist brace till it heals.  It was black and blue and it still hurts.   

Over and over again I said…"That was so stupid!!!!"  (Stupid is a 4 letter swear word only worse because it's 6 bad letters.)

Over and over again I thanked God it was not worse.  

So... I skate boarded but only for one millionth of a second!!! (and never again) 

Love, mom.  "

What a funny, lively woman!!  What a blessing she is in our lives, and how grateful to God we are that she is still walking after her skateboard attempt! 

I Need YOUR Help

Gosh, I have so much I want to write about and not enough hours in the day! I can't express how therapeutic it is to put in writing the many ways the Lord is blessing my life. It is healing to go back to a dark few months and see more clearly the miracles along the way… to see HIS ALMIGHTY HAND.

I have been feeling strongly that I would like for YOU: my readers and friends, to share YOUR stories of faith and miracles because YOUR stories strengthen me. I'm not sure exactly how it will turn out, but so many of you have shared your experiences via email, I would love permission to share them on my blog. It is a blessing to share these miracles from God. (I know that some are too private, sacred and personal.) Ever since my children began writing their miracles, they have a tendency to recognize God's goodness in their lives even more.

I have found that ever since I returned to writing again, I am so much more focused on the good in the world. My perspective changes when I write… I feel as if I open a column of personal communication and revelation from God for my life when I take the time to meditate on my life.

I would love it if YOU would share YOUR faith-building experiences to my email, and I will share one of those stories every week on my blog (with your permission only.) I can share it anonymously or with your name- whatever you choose.

My email address is mydailymiracles@gmail.com. 

Please do not stop sharing your experiences with me! I will only share them on my blog if you give me permission.

I know the Lord is working through and in all of our lives, and we are mutually uplifted as we see how HE is creating such personalized miracles for each of our lives… all with the same perfect love.

Please share your stories with me to my email. God is in all the details of our lives. HE is there… even when we do unthinkable things… like try to skateboard as a Senior Citizen!  God is so good!!

Fluffy & Rumblemuffin

Our Bunny Miracle

This past Christmas was AMAZING. I promise to write this week about the miracles that happened at Christmastime with our wish lists… people are so good!

The day before Christmas Eve, I asked Jordan what he wanted for Christmas. He said he didn't need anything at all. (He knew we didn't have very much money and didn't want to put stress on the family.) Tyson overheard him and said, "Jordan go-ahead and tell mom what you really want." 

After much hesitation, he said, "I want a pet that I can cuddle with."

Shocked because I already have about a million human bodies to feed and clean up after, I said "Oh no Jordan- no pets!!" 

Then, he sweetly said, "That's ok. What about a fish?" 

I was touched by his sweet response, and the wheels began turning in my head of how to satisfy his wish. To cover up I said, "No way, Jordan." 

He responded sweetly, "That's ok. A pretend fish?"

Oh my gosh… he was breaking my heart!!  I told Jordan I was sorry but he would have other gifts for Christmas.

That day I called his old football coach. He breeds rabbits. I asked him what was required to take care of a rabbit. He told me to come over the following day, and he would give Jordan a rabbit and a temporary cage. I was so excited!!! On Christmas Eve, Abe and I snuck the cage into our bathroom. 

The rabbit was one of our last gifts to pull out… Jordan and EVERYONE ELSE were thrilled to see the cute, little, brown rabbit… a REAL ONE!!  

They adored this rabbit. I have posted pictures of Juliana with the brown rabbit. They named him Fluffy. 

One day, about a month ago, Juliana left the cage open during the night and Fluffy was gone by morning. The boys immediately ran through the woods looking for him. With sad faces and drooped shoulders, they returned with no Fluffy. The empty cage was devastating for everyone. All kinds of big, wild animals roam through our yard; some have even tried to get into Fluffy's tiny cage. We were certain that Fluffy was gone for good...and most likely dead.

We all prayed for Fluffy, but Mariah continued to pray with the most faith for Fluffy's safe return. I greatly doubted the likelihood of his return. 

The same day that Fluffy was gone, I called our friend and delivered the sad news about Fluffy. I told him I would be returning his cage that day. He immediately insisted that we keep the cage and come pick out a new rabbit. 

By that same afternoon, we came home with a small, white rabbit. The children named him Rumblemuffin.

Rumblemuffin was with us for only two days when Juliana looked outside and saw Fluffy hopping to our front porch! Our brown bunny had returned! You should have seen the excitement! We ran after him so wildly that he ran off scared and we had to chase him down in the forest. 

Mariah immediately reminded us that God brought Fluffy back home safely. 

She was right… what a sweet blessing from God to see Fluffy!  Not only was he alive, but he was sitting on our porch!! God cares about us. God cares about our children. God cares about what makes us happy. We all know that God answered our prayers- especially that of Mariah who maintained her faith and continued to pray for Fluffy. 

God kept little Fluffy safe from the animals in the woods and brought him home. 

God can CERTAINLY bring all of us safely home!!!

But now we had two bunnies!!!  

This too was a blessing. If we hadn't lost the first one, we wouldn't have had the courage to get a second one… and the children were even MORE overjoyed!! 

But now we needed a bigger cage… 

Abe could see that the children were definitely in love with these bunny rabbits, so he did something COMPLETELY out of his nature. He borrowed some tools, turned our garage into a carpenter's lab and built a rabbit hutch.. in his "spare" time.

Yes… my cute city man built a rabbit hutch for the children's bunnies. He even built a divider in case we get a female bunny and some day want baby bunnies… we will wait a bit for that! 

But look at what Abe built!!

The Talent Show: Touching Hearts

Last fall my children were in a fashion show that was a fundraiser for a wonderful organization called  Clarita's House. http://www.claritashouse.com  I was in charge of the children models. I told my kids to give it their all out there on the runway… oh my goodness… they DID!! They strutted their way to the end and danced their hearts out. Jordan was the highlight of the event when he dropped to the ground and did the worm!  Baby Jayden ran out after him. He too dropped to the ground. I thought he had fallen down! Nope… he was trying to do the worm too. The audience laughed, cheered, and snapped all kinds of pictures. It was a fun day, and the event was a great success.

The following is the video they made with highlights from the fashion show. The first minute and fifty seconds have a little bit of each of us. Even though we missed Jordan and Jayden's second entrance with the worm on the stage, they have a snip of Jordan practicing his worm before the show at 3 minutes and 34 seconds. Crazy little boy… :-)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jddTKkhEZQY

Soon after the fashion show, we received an email requesting that my children perform in a competition talent show in the Orlando area because they had heard about the kids' performances on the runway. I gladly accepted the invitation. If nothing else, I knew the children would have fun. 

Our family had just sang the song "Glorious" for a Christmas program we had put on at church. (Stephanie Mabey sang and wrote the song, and David Archuleta made it famous.) This song is very close to our heart.

The following link is David Archuleta's version:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GytW_rgr0RM

Tyson, Jordan and Mariah prepared to sing "Glorious" in the younger kids division, and Jackson prepared a piece on his drum set to compete against the older kids.

Two days before the talent show, the organizers of the event informed me that I would need to prepare a second number in case our children made it to the finals. What?!? I didn't have time to prepare a second piece. The children sang through a couple songs that they could possibly do IF we made it to the finals… but we really didn't have time to prepare anything special. We had guests coming in from out of town that same weekend, and Abe was out of town too. I was swamped.

The day of the event came. Tyson, Jordan and Mariah performed "Glorious" beautifully. When they finished, I trembled as I watched the people rise to their feet. They were the only ones to receive a standing ovation the entire evening! Jackson did an awesome job drumming on his set and received a great applause after his rock session. :-)

They announced those who would go to the finals round, and Tyson, Jordan and Mariah were selected from their song, "Glorious." I immediately grabbed them and ran outside to prepare them for a second number. They knew lots of songs from church that they had been singing their entire lives, so we created a quick medley of "A Child's Prayer" and "I am a Child of God."

I told the children that they would NOT win first place because there were some highly talented children performing. Instead, we huddled as a family and asked God for HIS Spirit so that we would be able to touch hearts.  

I sat nervously through the performances waiting for my little ones' turn. We had only talked about what they would do on stage and quickly sang through the songs. These songs were so simple and basic that I wondered how this could this match their first number?

Their hope was to share God's light.

Mariah stood alone in the center of the stage and sang in acapella the first part of "A Child's Prayer."

Heavenly Father, are you really there?
And do you hear and answer ev'ry child's prayer?
Some say that heaven is far away, 
But I feel it close around me as I pray.
Heavenly Father, I remember now
Something that Jesus told disciples long ago:

"Suffer the children to come to me."
Father, in prayer I'm coming now to thee.

She knelt down for the final words "Father in prayer I'm coming now to thee."

Her brothers then entered the stage from both sides and knelt by her side as they sang with her these words:

Pray, he is there; 
Speak, he is list'ning.
You are his child; 
His love now surrounds you.
He hears your prayer; 
He loves the children.
Of such is the kingdom, the kingdom of heav'n.

Then all three children rose up together holding hands as they sang in strong voices, "I am a Child of God."

1. I am a child of God,
   And he has sent me here,
   Has given me an earthly home
   With parents kind and dear.
2. Lead me, guide me, walk beside me,
   Help me find the way.
3. Teach me all that I must do
   To live with him someday.
   
   
   It was simple, and it was beautiful.

They announced the winners, starting with third place. We cheered for everyone and then looked around the room as they prepared to announce the 1st place winner. There was a drum roll… Everybody sat quietly. First place would receive a significant cash prize. We waited and smiled at all the contestants… then they announced, "The Mills Family!!" What an absolute surprise and joyful time for my little performers. They received their prize and smiled for pictures. Then they returned to their seats.

After the entire show was over, my children were still sitting in their seats when a lady approached them with tears in her eyes. She said, "I just want you to know how much you touched my heart." Wow! That was the best part of the day. That was EXACTLY what we prayed for. We wanted to touch hearts. Not only did God allow the children to win the entire contest from singing songs about HIM, but HE allowed them to touch hearts in the process… for that was their truest desire… to touch hearts.

In a day and age where there is so much emphasized on big, spectacular presentations, the audience and the judges were touched by the Holy Ghost as the children shared a humble and eternal message from God. 

A Year of Faith: Happy Anniversary!

Today, Abe and I have been married for 14 years!!

On our 12-year anniversary, I wrote about our story of how we met. :-) If interested, the link is below:

http://abeandrachelsbeautifullife.blogspot.com/2013/03/12-years-of-marriage-our-story.html

This past year-and-a-half, among other struggles, we have struggled financially. Abe has been working jobs all over the country. He has worked as a salesman and has sold just about everything possible in the past year: roofing, alarms, TV, solar panels, outdoor kitchens, etc. He left for weeks at a time and wasn't at church with us even once for 4 months straight because of his travels. He missed almost all of the kids' football/cheer games… for not nearly enough pay. He never panicked. He just continued to work hard.

Miracle at Walmart

Last fall, I ran into Walmart to get some fruit and some crackers for my children for lunch before I had to race them back to their afternoon classes. When I got to the checkout, I realized I didn't have enough money for everything. I only bought the crackers and ran like a crazy woman around Walmart returning everything else.

Meanwhile, my kids were in the car waiting for me with my phone. They answered a phone call from a friend of mine. She told them that she was right by Walmart and wanted to give us some things. This friend who called me had NO IDEA that I had just returned my groceries. In fact, once I returned to my car, I was trying to call her back to tell her I didn't have time for a visit. Before I could connect with her, she pulled up right behind me in the parking lot. She came running out with a bag of Clementine oranges- just like the ones I had sadly returned to Walmart only moments before.

That was an absolute miracle, and I knew it. Who randomly gives oranges to somebody in a Walmart parking lot? How did she know I had gone shopping but had to leave with only some crackers… wishing I had enough money for the fruit too? She didn't know…. but the Lord knew and inspired a friend to remind me that God was and is aware of every tiny moment in our lives. What a sweet gift from a kind friend following God's direction…

This morning I was reading in Matthew chapter 14 when Jesus walks on water.

When the disciples saw HIM walking on water, they feared that HE was a spirit, and Jesus said to them in verse 27: "...Be of good cheer; it is I; be not afraid." Peter also began to walk on water towards Jesus…

verses 30-31: "But when he saw the wind boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink he cried, saying, Lord, save me.. And immediately Jesus stretched forth his hand, and caught him, and said unto him, O thou of little faith, wherefore didst thou doubt?"

Like Peter, I sink when I doubt. I have to make a conscious effort to not doubt that HE will stretch forth his hand when I need it.

The gift of the clementines alone is reason enough for me to remember that principle and to have faith in HIS plan for me.

I certainly learned a tremendous amount of faith this past year…

The Flooded Car

The tests of faith continued…

One morning a few months ago, it had been raining hard all night long. Abe was driving Jackson to church at 5:30 am for his early morning seminary class. He was 1 block away from the church, and the street was dark still when he hit a deep puddle. Abe tried to drive faster through the puddle when he realized how deep it was, but his car stopped… and nothing he did could get it started again.

Abe called me as the water rose almost to his car door. Needless to say, his car was destroyed. So here we were, with 6 kids who each had a million activities they needed to be at while Abe was trying to work extra jobs that all required a vehicle… In fact, one day Abe walked 8 miles back from a job because he didn't have the heart to tell me he needed a ride. When I finally found him, he was waving his white towel in the air… I couldn't help but laugh at the sad sight of my weary, sweaty husband…I knew that this too was part of our trial… this was our "boisterous wind," and we were determined to maintain our faith.

The Lord truly did take care of us through our financial struggles. A couple of wonderful friends gave Abe some side jobs: clearing out homes, DJing, and voice lessons. One friend gave me a job to tutor her daughter in reading. Another friend gave me a job to teach her daughter piano. A neighbor gave me a job to make banana bread for his entire office- and he paid me generously. :-) We were making it inch by inch and were truly learning how to trust Jesus and not to "sink."

The Lord Stretched Forth HIS Hand in a MARVELOUS Way!!

Abe applied for a job a couple of years ago while we still lived in Michigan. This particular job seemed like the perfect job. He would be presenting leadership training principles to large companies and organizations. He would be using his public speaking skills on a regular basis. He prepared a presentation and was interviewed by Skype, but he didn't get the job. In fact, the interview ended in a way that Abe felt like they even wondered why he would be applying for such a job.

A few weeks ago, Abe received a phone call out of the blue from the same company on a Monday asking him if he was still interested in applying for that job. What? Two years later? Abe, of course, said he was!

They flew him to California two days later. Thursday he auditioned live in front of the owners of the company, and he was offered the job that very same day.

He started training that following Monday- exactly one week from the initial phone call.

He is teaching principles that he firmly believes in and is working with men and women who have a deep faith in God. He will be home every weekend for the kids' activities and for church. We receive full benefits starting April 1st without any out-of-pocket expenses.

We are still in shock. How did this happen? One minute we were wondering where each and every dollar was coming from, and within one week Abe was working his dream job.

I am grateful to be married to a man with whom I can struggle, find faith, and experience joy into the eternities. What a beautiful challenge this life is. We are not perfect. We make mistakes. We have committed to stay together; and because of that mutual determination and faith in God, we have overcome great challenges.

Thank you, Abe, for trying so hard, for loving and teaching our children, and for using all that God has given you to give us a beautiful life of learning and of love. Thank you for loving God. Thank you for living with passion and heart.

Thank you for loving me and for believing in me and in us.

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!

(Abe's drinking sparkling grape juice by the way. :-))