Joyful Faces

Abe has been gone for the last several days, but nine sweet children (6 of my own) have been by my side for most of this past weekend.  All 9 accompanied me on a service project Saturday with a nonprofit organization called www.claritashouse.com.  We were to sort food and distribute it for those who were in need.

All the children were ecstatic to help in some way.  As we prepared to leave the service project, there was quite a bit of snack food left over.  Seeing me with 9 young children, the other volunteers loaded our van up with some of the left-over boxes of crackers, cookies, and drinks.

Oh you should have seen the excitement on the children's faces when they saw what they were receiving.  We rarely buy snacks such as these, so they had a serious feast in the back of our big shuttle van.

As we drove down the street with our van full of children stuffing their faces with their favorite snacks, I looked to my right and saw a solemn-looking woman holding up a sign that said, "HUNGRY."

I called back to the children to grab food for her as fast as they could.

OH MY GOODNESS!  You should have seen the mass chaos of children diving over each other in the van handing food out the window to this woman as fast as they could.  The children were giggling with joy, and the woman receiving the food couldn't help but turn her solemn demeanor into a giggle too as she saw innocent, joyful faces filling her arms with food.

The light turned green, and we had to drive away.  One of the children stuck his head out the window and yelled, "God bless you!!" His final message was fitting since God really was the one who gave them the joy in their hearts and the desire to give.

Do you know how I know God was in their hearts?  These children didn't give away their least desirable treats; they gave away their very favorite treats from the van!  

About 4 minutes later we came to another stop light, and one of the boys yelled out, "Over there! Over there!"

To our right was a man with two young children standing on the side of the road holding up a sign requesting aid.

One of my 9 children then stuck his head out the window and shouted, "Sir, sir!! Here- we have food for you!"

The man ran over to our van and received more food than he could hold.  My van of children called the man's son over as well.  The young boy raced over with his small arms opened wide.

The little boy's face touched my heart the very most.  Pure joy and excitement shown in his eyes as he saw the delicious treats delivered by boys his very age.  This young boy did not look ashamed or embarrassed of his situation because he knew the givers had pure and true intentions.

That's what it was!! Pure joy for the givers and pure joy for the receivers.  I know that's how God intended it to be.  

After the giving was over, for a split second, I hoped we still had enough snacks for our children to enjoy during our days of moving over the next few days.  That selfish thought only lingered a moment because I promptly recognized the value of what these children were learning…

In Matthew 25:35-40 Jesus says:

 35 For I was an ^ahungred, and ye ^bgave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a ^cstranger, and ye took me in:

 36 Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye ^avisited me: I was in ^bprison, and ye came unto me.

 37 Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?

 38 When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee?

 39 Or when saw we thee ^asick, or in prison, and came unto thee?

 40 And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have ^adone it unto one of the ^bleast of these my ^cbrethren, ye have done it unto me.

As we give selflessly (and wisely), we trust God to take care of our every need.  So… although the food was appreciated and enjoyed, it wasn't really about the food.  It was about teaching the gospel of Jesus Christ by sharing hope, love, and joy… via the literal giving of food with joyful faces.  I would never trade the opportunity for those 9 children to give food to others in need in exchange for a few extra snacks throughout the week.

As it turned out, the children received both.  It truly felt like the loaves and fishes in Jesus' time because the children still had plenty of snacks to go around even after they gave so generously.  What a blessing to be able to give.

We were only able to experience this joyful giving because of the many hours of planning and preparation by the members of this wonderful organization.

Below is a short, touching video from when our family served Thanksgiving dinner to those who did not have a meal.  Members of our family are in this video, but you will also see a very special man praising God in a truly joyful way.

This man arrived to the Thanksgiving dinner in ragged clothes.  Upon arrival he received NEW clothes.  He immediately went somewhere to don his new attire.  He returned walking a little taller and a little prouder.  In fact, he felt so good and so joyful that all throughout his dinner he couldn't help but dance to the music with his arms outstretched praising God.  

Joy doesn't look much better than this!!! :-)  Enjoy the video and let me know if you would like to be involved with www.claritashouse.com in any way.
~May God bless you…  

Our Big, Happy News!! :-)

Fighting Depression

In all honesty I have been fighting depression a lot this fall.  I had to conquer the beast frequently by dropping to my knees and crying out to my Heavenly Father.  The Lord continued to show HIS hand by providing beautiful answers to so many prayers.  Seeing HIS hand in my life held me together when I was about to crumble completely. It was a real war inside my head!!  Just when I would conquer one battle of disappointment, another battle would present itself.

I felt powerless and without control over the situation.  I will never write the details of how we lost all our money, but our situation was instigated by the unethical practices of another.  That was a hard thing to swallow.  As I struggled through that pain, the thought continued to come into my mind, "It's ok.  Don't be angry.  This is where I wanted you anyway."  I had to remind myself of this over and over again because it felt as if life was being thrown at me instead of me taking the reins.  I felt as if I was hanging on to the tail of a long dragon, and the dragon was whipping me from side to side at the whims of his delight.  Sometimes I could even see that dragon in my mind, and I wanted to be set free.

In truth, when you listen to the adversary's influence that all is lost, you are in fact at the tail-end being whipped around.

On days when I wanted to crumble and go hide in a corner, I mustered up the courage to smile, to be joyful, and to try to make a difference.  My scriptures, deep love from my family, and many, many prayers were my iron rod.  I knew I could not let go of that iron rod that was guiding me through the very real mists of darkness trying to attack my brain!  I KNEW I was under attack, and I KNEW that I would push my way through it… but when???  In Elder Holland's October 2013 General Conference talk, "Like a Broken Vessel," he spoke about depression:

" At one point in our married life when financial fears collided with staggering fatigue, I took a psychic blow that was as unanticipated as it was real. With the grace of God and the love of my family, I kept functioning and kept working, but even after all these years I continue to feel a deep sympathy for others more chronically or more deeply afflicted with such gloom than I was. In any case we have all taken courage from those who, in the words of the Prophet Joseph, “search[ed] … and contemplate[d] the darkest abyss” ³and persevered through it—not the least of whom were Abraham Lincoln, Winston Churchill, and Elder George Albert Smith, the latter being one of the most gentle and Christlike men of our dispensation, who battled recurring depression for some years before later becoming the universally beloved eighth prophet and President of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints."

I have been tempted to believe it was a sign of weakness when depressing thoughts threatened to dominate my mind.  But when I pushed through those depressing thoughts with scriptures in hand, I felt stronger than ever before.  Each day was a strengthening moment when I decided to turn to the scriptures instead of wallowing in my disappointments and fears about our future.

I know that so many of you prayed for us, and I sob right now thinking about your beautiful hearts…taking the time to remember our little family in your prayers.  We were not starving.  We were not without shelter.  I just had a broken heart that was struggling to let go of things the way I wanted them to be.  The hard part was that I did not have unrighteous desires.  I wanted to have a home and money so we could have the means to touch other's lives.  Being molded in HIS hands, I learned how to help others the way God wanted me to.  It was God's ways… not mine.  God's ways have brought many miracles to our little neighborhood and to our ward and to our family.

A Push from God

In mid-December, I felt a very strong push in my heart and mind that it was time to change our situation, so I went full force trying to find our miracle.

My mother sent me a check with literal strings taped to it. Her instructions were that the check was not a gift.  It was only to be used to put a deposit down on a house.  (My mother is the greatest teacher the world has ever known!! - really!!)

I spent weeks searching for 2 bedroom homes.  I planned on stuffing all 6 children into one room, and Abe and I would be in another room.  I made inquiries on homes like this until a realtor finally told me that Florida law states that we had to have 4 bedrooms because of how many children we have.  I was slightly relieved because then I didn't feel greedy or guilty for looking for homes that were bigger and more desirable…it was the law!  

Once we started looking for 4-bedroom homes, we were looking at spending quite a bit more money unless we wanted to live in a very scary neighborhood.  We did find a couple of homes in a city about 45 minutes away.  The realtor sent the papers of our favorite home to my email.  Right when I was about to sign the papers, our friend rang the doorbell.  He was visiting from Tennessee!  I sent the realtor a text message saying we would have to wait until the morning to sign the papers.  

We spent several hours chatting with our friend.  Late that night, I went to print off the documents from my email, but I felt a very strong hesitation… I couldn't sign the papers.  We were waiting to hear about a possible job opportunity in Utah.  I thought maybe we needed to wait to hear back about that job.  We told the realtor that we would give him our decision by Friday.  By the following afternoon, somebody else had already snatched the home.  

Now what?!?  I honestly cannot count how many hours I spent investigating homes online… looking at schools, neighborhoods, proximity to Walmart and the church… nothing felt right.  The more we were willing to spend on a home, the more picky I became with the type and location of home we would be renting.  I was scared to look at nicer homes because I didn't want to be foolishly looking above our means.

Abe and I went to visit several homes.  Lots of them had lakes in the backyard, and I knew that would be a very serious hazard for our little Jayden.  Several had no yards; and with 6 children being home-schooled, I knew we needed space for them to run outside.  Several of the homes required too much money upfront.  Others required verification of our income which was difficult to prove with all of our side jobs… balloons, singing, piano, internet ventures etc. I began to lose hope, and I began to feel foolish for even thinking we could do this already… yet I was so desperate to have a home again, and I felt the push from God.

Becoming of One Heart Again

Throughout this struggle, I began to resent Abe for not providing us a home.  Through prayer and true miracles, both of our hearts softened.  I understood more of his pain, and he more fully understood mine.  A greater level of peace within our hearts was restored.  We were no longer in survival mode in our marriage.  We were fully appreciating our differences and fully validating and understanding each other's concerns.  That was an important step in order for the Lord's great miracles to be realized in our lives.  

A couple of days ago I read in 4th Nephi in the Book of Mormon.  The people were feeling complete peace and oneness in the land.  Because of that peace 4 Nephi 1:5 says, "And there were great and marvelous works wrought by the disciples of Jesus… and all manner of miracles did they work among the children of men; and in nothing did they work miracles save it were in the name of Jesus."

Finding a Home… Would it Work?

Feeling greater hope and peace in our marriage, we decided to look once again for a home.  This time when I went on one of the rental websites, Daytona Beach popped up.  I kept rewriting the website so that Orlando would pop up instead.  Twice I returned to the computer and Daytona Beach popped up again.  Daytona Beach was over an hour away.  We had been looking in a 45 mile radius from Orlando feeling no peace about anything we found.  Just for fun, I decided to check what was in the area KNOWING that's not where we would end up.  

Shocked, I saw a BEAUTIFUL house with 5 bedrooms that was at a great price.  (I secretly wanted 5 bedrooms for "other" reasons that I knew Abe wasn't ready to consider yet.)  We also saw another BEAUTIFUL house with 4 bedrooms.  Both homes were well-maintained in clean and safe neighborhoods.  Both were in a city north of Daytona Beach.  This would be at least an hour and a half drive away from our in-law's home where we had been staying.  

They were both literally a block away from the ocean on one side and a block and a half away from a beautiful river and wildlife preserve on the other side.  Beautiful hikes through the woods bordered this river.  

It seemed too good to be true.  My heart and soul are connected to nature and water.  It would be my ultimate dream!!  It could never happen…  How could it?  How could things be going my way?  I felt like I had complained too much and didn't deserve to have what I really wanted.  

Visiting the Home

Abe and I decided we had to visit the homes just to mark them off our lists.  I was concerned about wasting gas on the hour and a half drive merely to check something off our list.  Abe insisted it would make us feel better to check it out.  I called the realtors of both homes to find out more information.  The realtor of the home I loved the most had just moved to Florida from Michigan!  She was so sweet and so wonderful- I felt connected to her immediately.  We chatted about our Michigan memories, and I scheduled a viewing for the next day- which was last Friday.  I also scheduled a viewing of the other home with 4 bedrooms.

That night I felt scared.  

Several thoughts ran through my mind:  How in the world could we ever afford this home?  Is this foolish?  Is God going to help us to make ends meet?  Is this what God wants?  I want it so badly- am I forcing this to happen?

I let go of all my worries and lay in bed peacefully thinking….

All of a sudden a very clear proposal came to my mind of a plan that would give us time to make the payments.  I felt in my heart that I would need to ask the realtor of both beautiful homes if they would accept this plan.  I told Abe about the plan that came into my mind, and I told him it felt like it came from God.  At first he had a hard time following what I was even explaining.  Then he raised his eyebrows doubting either one would accept such an offer.  I told him that God gave it to me, so I had a good feeling about it.

The moment we entered the city of our destination, my heart began to pound very heavily in my chest.  I wanted to squeal with excitement.  I told Abe I couldn't be trusted with my emotions.  This was my dream spot, and I wouldn't be able to differentiate between my heart and the Holy Ghost.

Then the thought came to me:  "What if the Holy Ghost put these desires into my heart? What if God is so great at orchestrating our lives that HE is using our desires to place us where HE wants us to fulfill HIS purposes."

I continued to ponder as we viewed both homes. I asked both realtors about the proposal I had received during the night.

Just as I assumed, the realtor of the 4 bedroom home wouldn't do it.  HOWEVER, the realtor of the home I really loved the most understood my proposal and accepted it without even thinking twice about it.  That was my answer!  I knew we could do it… somehow!!  I even committed to tying balloons in the streets to make it work.  It just felt right.  

Violin Miracles!!  Truly, Truly Beautiful People

On Tuesday before seeing this home on-line, I decided to ask my children's violin teacher what my children would have to do if we lived out of the school district.  Sadly she said Jordan would have to give his violin back, but Mariah could keep hers… then she hesitated… she said Mariah could keep hers because she had been paying for Mariah's rental fee for her!!  I burst into tears.  I had no idea!  I thought Mariah was borrowing hers from the school district just like Jordan.  I'm certain this absolutely amazing woman watched Mariah carry her tiny violin with her into class several times a week feeling grateful in her heart that Mariah was having the opportunity to learn.  Oh I just couldn't even stop crying.  I still can't!!  Her heart is beyond beautiful!! In fact, every time I see her I cry again.

I went to scouts that night with emotions very close to the surface.  When I arrived, a sister walked up to me and handed me ANOTHER violin.  She said that she and her daughter had held a Family Home Evening the night before to decide who should receive her violin which was now too small for her daughter.  They both decided that our family should have it.  She had NO IDEA that we would possibly be giving up our violins to move away.  She had NO IDEA that I had just been talking to this other sister about the violins that very day.  She heard a prompting and followed it!!  I cried so hard when she gave us the violin.  We both cried and hugged.  The gift of music is indescribable.  It's a gift of opportunity and of richness.  She was in a hurry to get home, so I still haven't had the opportunity to tell her how significant her gift is.  How significant it is that the very day I realized that we might have to give up the violins, was the very day we would be offered one to have permanently.

It felt as if all would be well if we had to move further away than we planned, but both Abe and I still worried about his job…

The Job

I wrote in a previous blog about a very intense fast I performed a few weeks ago.  I wrote about the strong impressions I received to move forward with finding a home after having that fast.  Shortly after that blog post, Abe was laid off from his job indefinitely, Abe's car broke down, and on Sunday baby Jayden had to go to the emergency room for stitches.

Ummmm…. that was NOT what I expected… laid off?  No car?  Hospital bills?  We had lots of side incomes, and granted… this job wasn't providing a good income, but we were grateful for every dollar.

I wrote in my blog about how strengthened I felt from my fast, but I assumed that nothing else came from my fast at that particular time.  Well… that's just because I didn't recognize it!!

On the very day that I devoted my fast to finding a new house, Abe was doing an interview and was hired!  He even told me (very casually) that he was hired.  Since it was only commission-based and he had been "hired" by several companies this fall which were only commission-based, I dismissed this job in my mind along with the others.

It took about a week of hearing Abe talk about upcoming shows and training for his job that it hit me. Wait a minute!  Abe!  You got a real job- and you got it the same day of my fast!!  I was beginning to realize that being laid off from his other job allowed Abe to search for and find a job with greater opportunity.  

Signing the Papers & Miraculous Details

We recognized that God was definitely guiding us.  On Monday, we decided to take a huge and seemingly foolish step into the dark.  We filled out the application for the home and mailed the application fee.    Next, we requested the lease.  It took a couple of days for them to write up the lease under the terms we had requested.  We signed it, and the realtor signed it today (Thursday)!!  Move-in date is this coming Tuesday!!!  Yikes!!!  We are so excited!!  We feel so good about it… but we also know there is so much for us to do to make it work.  

Abe worked his first official day on Tuesday of this week.  We were praying so hard to know if this job would be the one to get us through this transition.  As of Thursday, he was the top salesman for the past two days at the show!  You don't know the joy in my heart to know that he is excelling!!   We are all praising God. 

Abe and I united ourselves once again to promise to work together on our other business ventures. 

This very week when we are moving forward on complete faith, an unexpected check was deposited into our bank from a concert Abe did a couple of months ago.  I believe it is not a coincidence that we received that check on the very week that we signed the papers on a house.

In the beginning of December, a lady, who is now a friend of mine, approached me about hosting business shows at big conventions.  It pays very well, and I hoped to be called.  Just a couple of days ago Abe's dad asked me if I had been contacted about hosting any business shows.  I told him no.  I thought those opportunities for money were gone.  

Once we sent in our application on the home, I received two potential hosting jobs!!  Are you kidding? Once again, I believe the timing is crucial because it's as if God saw us apply our faith and then opened the windows of blessings to reassure our worried hearts that all would be well. 

Missionary Transfer

I have had a deep concern about our sweet neighbors who have been coming to church.  I love them so very much.  I want them to know that my love for them and my desire for them to continue in their quest for truth is of the upmost sincerity.  I have been praying so intently for them.  

Yesterday, one of my sweet readers left a comment on my blog reminding me "these missionaries were called to serve at this time in your area."  It's true!!  There are 4 sets of missionaries serving in our congregation.  Two are teaching one neighbor and two others are teaching another neighbor.  They couldn't be more perfectly called at the right time.

One set of these missionaries is a new set of Spanish-speaking sister missionaries.  I had the honor to give these sisters a ride to their new apartment.  Before I drove them to their new apartment, my children and I attended their huge transfer meeting.  

The chapel was full of missionaries waiting to hear about where they would be serving next.   As I sat in the foyer, I heard a missionary talking over the pulpit about his transfer.  As he spoke, the thought came into my mind, "Your friends are in my hands.  You're just on a missionary transfer."  

I felt so much peace hearing that perspective in my mind.  I didn't feel like I was abandoning my dear friends; God will place others in their path, and we will continue loving them.  When we lived in Utah I had asked God to allow our family to serve a mission somehow.  My prayers have been answered!  Our family is on a missionary transfer. 

Long Story Short Version :-)

*I pushed through months of a hovering temptation to melt into depression.  The ONLY reason I was able to stomp it out each day was because of increased scripture study, messages of strength from my mother, patience from my husband, my children's unwavering faith, and heartfelt prayers from you and by me. 

*Abe is working an unlikely job that came during an intense fast, and he's excelling!!!  Hooray!

*We found our dream house.  It still doesn't seem real because the house is EXACTLY what I've always wanted… We're moving to a 5 bedroom home right between the ocean and the river- both only a block or two away!!!  There are sidewalks for miles and miles, so we can ride our bikes all over the place.  There are trails and national parks all within bike riding distance.

*The miracles of violins, jobs, and friends came when Abe and I fasted, united, and applied our faith.

*God's timing was paramount… When God tells you it's time, IT'S TIME!! My "time" was about 5 months ago, but HE opens the doors to create marvelous miracles when we patiently push through the struggle and wait on HIS timing.

Thank you!!

I can't thank you enough for your prayers- your words of encouragement- your love.  I know that just because we're moving to our beach home (my dream home), does not mean that all our struggles will disappear.  Not so… that's definitely not what was intended for this life.  I do feel I have grown a bit.  More than anything, I have grown in my testimony of Jesus' great, magnificent love for us.  HE is busy orchestrating the details of our lives. 

Unselected Photo- Blessed Little Boy

As a member of the primary presidency of the church, I wanted to get to know the children's faces even better.  I decided to take pictures of all 85 children who attend and put them up on the wall.

A few days ago I was uploading other unrelated photos onto my blog, and a random picture of a young primary age boy kept uploading along with the others.  I never selected it, but it uploaded two different times with the other photos selected.  After I was finished uploading all my photos, I had to then select the ones I actually wanted to use.  I made my selections, and his photo came up with those that were selected as well (even though I did not select it)!  I thought this was very strange!

I'm fairly new to our congregation, so there are a lot of children whose names I do not yet know.  This boy is different; I don't even know who his parents are!  He just started coming to church the last several weeks.  I have talked to him many times and have often guided him on how to be more reverent. :-)  He is progressively improving his behavior; I even noticed last Sunday that he was giving more thoughtful comments during the sharing time when all the children were gathered together.

After this young boy's photo showed up for the third time, the thought came into my mind, "I wonder if  there's a reason for this.  Maybe I'm supposed to be pondering about this young boy some more."

Last night the elders in our area called me.  They asked me to speak at a 10-year old boy's baptism.  I described the young boy whose photo had appeared on my computer so many times just two days before and asked the missionaries if this was the boy who was getting baptized.  They said he was!

I felt the Spirit speak to my heart that this was my opportunity to ponder greatly about this young boy as the impression from the Holy Ghost had foretold me.  I will spend the next several days praying for him and pondering on the words he will need to hear at his baptism.  What a blessing.  I asked the missionaries to tell me a little bit about this young boy's life.

This sweet 10-year old boy has been through quite a bit!!  He recently moved in with his grandmother, and he is progressing rapidly as he allows the teachings of the gospel of Jesus Christ to enter his heart.

The fact that his picture kept popping up several times just days before I was asked to speak at his baptism could be seen as a coincidence.  However, the spiritual confirmation and the words which accompanied that "coincidence" confirmed that it was more.  I believe the Lord wanted me to know how special this young boy is.  I look forward to speaking at his baptism.  I know the Lord is looking out for ALL HIS children.




P.S.  For those of you who are sweetly waiting to hear about our big news:  Our family is waiting on a few details… I'll hopefully be writing about our big, happy news tonight. :-)  God bless you all!!

Sunday's Miracles

On Sunday, we went by our children's neighborhood buddies' homes to see if they still wanted to come to church with us.  We were a little discouraged when nobody answered the door.  We knew they had been excited to go to church all week.  They had expressed their excitement about having bought official church clothes for Sunday's services.

In the middle of Sacrament meeting, I got up to take my little chatty Jayden out of the chapel.  I looked over at the sister missionaries as they excitedly pointed to the row in front of them.  My heart leaped with joy!!!  They came!!  Three young neighborhood friends sat on the bench, dressed in their Sunday best… with their mother sitting by their side!!  I immediately crouched down and hugged them.  I can't express in words how happy it made me to see them there with their mother- all choosing to attend church because it's where their heart told them they needed to be.

In the third hour of church, Jackson was supposed to receive the Aaronic Priesthood.  In our church, a young man at the age of 12 has the opportunity to receive the Aaronic Priesthood.  In order to receive this priesthood you have to have been baptized and have to be living a worthy life trying to be like Jesus.

I entered the priesthood meeting to find Jackson and to invite the neighbor boys to Jackson's ordination to the Aaronic Priesthood.  As I walked back up the aisle, I saw yet another beautiful sight which made my heart jump.   Two more young men, who are also our neighbors, sat at the back of the chapel.  I approached them and asked them if they would like to join us while Jackson received the priesthood.  They were sitting by the Elders (missionaries), and they asked me what the priesthood was.

I quickly explained how the priesthood authority had been restored to Joseph Smith by angels and that Jackson would receive the priesthood by the laying on of hands from his father.  Abe had received his priesthood from his father who also received this special power from God by the laying on of hands by those who held the authority to do so.  The missionary smiled on as I also explained some of the duties of the priesthood.  (As a deacon, Jackson will have the opportunity to pass the sacrament to the congregation on Sundays.)

We entered the room where Jackson would receive the priesthood.  What a beautiful sight it was!  Five neighborhood friends were in attendance learning about the priesthood for the first time from a very worthy young man… our little Jackson.

Jackson later approached me on his own to tell me about his experience of receiving the Aaronic Priesthood and becoming a deacon:

"Mom, I felt the Spirit really strong.  I could feel the priesthood entering my body," he said.

Never having held the priesthood, I asked him what that felt like.

He answered, "A warm feeling started at my head and went down to my shoulders and all the way through my body."

Jordan, who was baptized just last month, overheard Jackson's description and excitedly said, "I felt that feeling before too!  I felt it when I received the Holy Ghost after my baptism!  That same warm feeling went from my head all the way down my body too."

My testimony quadrupled in that very moment.  That was not a planned dialogue.  That was merely two brothers sharing their honest testimonies from their own, very real experiences.

After church I found my friend, the mother of the football buddies, and asked her how church was.  She told me she recognized the picture on the wall of the church as the same picture inside her Book of Mormon by her door at her home!!

The sister missionaries and I teared up immediately.  My friend told us she had taken the missionary discussions 12 years ago!  I had no idea!  She said her husband at the time wouldn't let her continue learning about the gospel.  Now that they are divorced, she expressed her gratitude to be learning about the gospel once again.  Please pray for her and her family!  Their first missionary discussion is tomorrow!!

What- a- day!!  To see my son receive the priesthood was special in and of itself… but to have so many of his friends share in that joy was even better.

My favorite part of the day was discovering that my oldest son's testimony was his own.  His very own!!  It was not a borrowed light!!  Through his own life experiences, he is discovering Heaven's truths.

Over the past couple of days, I had been worried about our children.  I hoped I was teaching them in a way that they would continue to remain faithful to Jesus Christ and HIS gospel.

My eyes were opened.  I have every confidence now that I can place this worry directly into God's hands.  I only have to do my best to provide teaching opportunities.  I only have to take the time to teach my children the truths I feel in my heart…

I can definitely do that!!

The Holy Ghost will confirm and imprint those truths into my children's hearts and minds in ways that I could never do on my own.

So… I do the best I know how and let God work HIS mighty miracles… it's a perfect plan.

These are pictures of a few of the neighborhood friends on our last outing a couple of weeks ago. :-)  What a great group of kids!

Heavenly Blessings & Disney Magic

I wrote last week about a dear friend who surprised us with a trip to Disney World.  Beyond the fact that Disney World is filled with happy, magical music and smiling faces, let me give you a little background as to why Disney World is sooo extra special to us.

I ran 2 marathons (26.2 miles each) at Disney World several years ago to raise money to fight cancer.  Abe is not a runner, but he wanted to be a part of this worthy cause.  He ran the second marathon with me.  We ran in honor of my sister who passed away from cancer and in honor of my mom and Abe's dad who are both cancer survivors.  We ran in honor of many other loved ones as well.  Their names were written all over the backs of our shirts.

Although we trained for 5 months leading up to this race, my poor husband hurt his knee at mile 8 and ran with a limp and an ice pack the remaining 18 miles!!!  He was in excruciating pain, but he kept going.  We were running in honor of the many people in our lives who had fought cancer so valiantly.

I have only seen Abe cry a few times in my life, and finishing this marathon was one of those times… not because of the pain but because the goal had been reached.  A woman came up to Abe at the finish line and with deep emotion told Abe, "I ran behind you the entire time.  When I got tired and wanted to quit, I kept telling myself that if he can finish, I can too!" 

Wow!  I know Abe had no idea that amidst his pain he was inspiring others to keep going.  He felt weak, but his strength through that weakness gave strength to others. 

As you can see from the picture, I was blessed with extra energy that race.  I cheered for Abe, and I cheered for joy almost the entire race.  At the end of the race somebody approached me as well.  He said, "You weren't just his cheerleader.   You were mine too!!  Thank you!!"

I had no idea that anybody was paying attention to my shouts of joy and encouragement.  In fact one goofy man along the way told me to leave my husband because he was slowing me down!!!  I protested, "…but he's my husband!!"  He said, "I'm not talking about life.  This is a RACE!!"

Oh but to us it was about life!!  It was about all those who were fighting for their life against cancer.  It was about the glory and the agony and how God can use us to glorify HIM at every stage of our development in life.

Because of this race, Disney World will forever hold an EXTRA special place in our hearts.

Going to Disney World last week was a beautiful feeling knowing that we were ONLY able to go because of the loving, giving heart of another.  That made our experience even sweeter and our hearts fuller.

We stopped by my friend's house who was giving us the tickets.  The plan was that she was going to announce where we would be going for the day.  Instead, our friend decided she wanted the kids to be surprised by driving up to the entrance.  It sounded like a GREAT plan, so we told the children we would be following our friend around for a little bit so that we could see some possible homes for rent in the area.

Believing our story, the children all settled back in their seats and looked around.  As we got closer to Disney World, signs were popping up all around us.  The children started to quietly question, "Are we going to DisneyWorld?  Are there homes over here?"  I said, "No, I'm sure we're not going to DISNEY WORLD for goodness sakes."  As we got closer and closer I couldn't deny it any longer.  They started to scream, "We ARE going to Disney World!!!"

Tyson yelled out, "I'm going to throw up I'm so excited!!"  Once we pulled into the parking lot, they leaped over each other (forgetting all manners I might add) and piled all over our dear friend before she could even get all the way out of her car.

Our sweet friend had free passes for our parking and for 2 strollers!!  ...AND she brought juice boxes for the kids.  She even had hopper passes!! That meant we could choose 2 of the parks to visit.  She first took us to Epcot for a few hours.

Do you see that beautiful smile of hers?  She truly is an angel!!

While our friend went shopping, Abe and I did a parent swap and took turns playing with the little ones outside while the other one took a turn on the rides.

When it was my turn to go on the ride, this is how I found my husband… (shakin' my head)

Apparently... nothing can slow this man down from winning a space mission video game!!  I couldn't stop laughing when I found him like this!!!  He was doing a side to side swinging motion allowing each child a turn to hit the control keys- the poor children were hanging on for dear life! When I rescued them from the intensity of the space war, they looked like space war veterans!! :-) 

After several hours at Epcot, my friend escorted us to Magic Kingdom where we spent the rest of the day.  In the morning we were wearing shorts because it was hot!  By the evening, we poor Floridians had to put on jackets and blankets… while much of the rest of the nation was beginning to hit negative temperatures!! Yikes!  

Happy, happy hearts and happy, happy faces...

Silly, silly children...

Of course the day was wonderful in every way, but there were a couple of moments that made our day end on an even more magical note.

Jackson's Popcorn Blessing

Jackson's birthday was the following day- on Tuesday.  Jackson LOVES popcorn.  When we go on outings, he usually spends about an hour popping popcorn for the entire family, and then he puts it all into a big trash bag for all to share.  This trip was a surprise, so he didn't do it this time.  All day long I  heard him quietly say, "The birthday boy really would love some popcorn."

I felt bad for him- especially because he didn't complain about not getting the popcorn.  I could just tell he had a STRONG craving for it.  It was in his eyes!!

We have been trying to save every penny we can, so I told him the popcorn was way too expensive to buy enough for the entire family. It wouldn't be worth the money in the end.

It was hard to turn it down; however, especially when we had already eaten all of our peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and cheerios and dried fruit.

Near the end of the night, we passed one of the stands cleaning out the popcorn.  Jackson asked them if they were going to throw the popcorn away.  They said they were… Jackson was too scared to ask the next obvious question until I nudged him a bit.

A bit hesitant, he asked if they would be willing to give it away instead of throw it away.  It was against their rules, but they WERE able to give each of the children a large, complimentary, overflowing cup of popcorn.  After the children thanked the popcorn lady about one hundred times each, they buried their faces into their cups eating every last drop… as if we had starved them the whole day!  They were just THAT grateful for the popcorn!! :-)

For me, it wasn't so much about the popcorn itself, but it was more about the details that God provided to make it just a little bit more perfect… especially for the birthday boy.

Jordan's Shooting Range Blessing

All day Jordan kept mentioning that he REALLY wanted to spend a dollar at the shooting range.  We kept turning him down because there were so many other AMAZING things to do… for free.  Finally, about 20 minutes before closing time, we decided to let him go and use his own money.  When he put his dollar in, his rifle didn't work. I reported it to the man in charge.  When he saw our big family, he decided to turn the whole shooting range on for free for UNLIMITED USAGE!!  He smiled REALLY big when he saw how grateful we all were.  We had a blast shooting the targets until after the park officially closed!!  

As we bid the shooting range farewell, Jordan was grinning ear to ear because he felt like he had provided something really special for the family by suggesting the shooting range all day.  It truly was special to see the joy in my children's faces because of such a kind gesture from a stranger.  What a perfect ending to our magical day!

The value of our trip was over $1,000.00!!! What a tremendous blessing!!  This was something we definitely couldn't have provided for our children without God's help and the help of our earthly Angel.  

Cold weather couldn't stop us!  Nothing stopped us!!  ...the Mills Family closed the place down!! 

We arrived home by midnight… 

saying goodnight to a day of Disney Magic...

The Heavenly Blessings, however, will continue day after day. They ALWAYS do!

Changes Part 2: Big News Coming:-)

Thank you so much for continuing to read even though I have changed my writing to only once a week!!  I continue to enjoy hearing back from so many of you, but something strange has happened…

I can't quite explain it, but I MISS YOU even though I've never met you!  Many of you have expressed through emails, comments, and other messaging, that you feel our hearts are connected although we have never met face to face.  I feel it too!!  Since I'm not writing in my blog every day, I miss thinking about you throughout the week.  Maybe I miss feeling your hearts through a more Heavenly line of communication???

Tonight my little 6-year old Mariah saw me sitting at my computer, and said, "Are you still writing in your blog?"  I answered, "Yes!  Of course I am… every week."  She then said, "I didn't know you were still writing.  It used to be one of my favorite things to do."

Confused, I questioned her further, "What used to be one of your favorite things to do?"

She answered, "Reading your blog used to be one of my favorite things to do."

I didn't realize how much the stories of our life meant to my little 6-year old daughter and realized I needed to make changes once again.

The truth is, it's easier to not write so often during the week, but I miss it.  When Sunday comes there are so many amazing blessings and miracles to write about that I have a hard time putting it all together. I fear I am missing the additional inspiration that comes along with deeply meditating about these experiences!!  I greatly miss my meditation time with God.

This past week was no different.  Oh my goodness… the things I can't wait to write about!!

We have BIG NEWS in the works and beautiful miracles are taking place!!!

I actually started to write about the trials and miracles leading up to this BIG NEWS, but something stopped me… I'm not sure why… maybe there are more details yet to come that I do not yet understand…

There are many details, trials, and blessings falling into place right now, and I feel inspired to wait until I can give you a FULL story.  God has been busy creating a beautiful piece of art in our lives including an emergency room, tears of joy, tears of stress, and tears of love from interacting with some of the most loving, selfless hearts you ever did know.  (You might have to read a very long post to find out the finale of this particular saga. :-))

Thank you!  I love you!!  I will be writing more frequently again… The details of our BIG NEWS will probably continue on Wednesday.  Until then, some special moments need to be recorded for my posterity.  I will be writing again tomorrow night. :-)

My heart is full!!

My testimony of Jesus Christ and HIS gospel is my greatest passion.  I can't give up this opportunity to share my testimony of Jesus Christ more frequently!!  How blessed I feel that people are actually listening to my testimony of HIM!!  My heart overflows with love when I ponder on what a grand blessing it is to be one of HIS disciples.  Jesus Christ is my Savior.  HE is your Savior.  HE is our KING!!

Four Months in the Making… DISNEY WORLD!

When we first moved here, a very sweet woman and I were chatting at soccer tryouts.  After learning that we were new to the area, she offered me 3 free Disney World tickets!  I was in awe at her generosity, and I was especially touched by her big, beautiful, warming smile.

I hated to tell her that as grateful as we were, we could not accept her offer because we couldn't even afford the remaining 4 tickets for the rest of our family.  A couple of months later, she said she now had 5 tickets for our family if we could go on a Sunday.  I again had to graciously turn her down because we were trying really hard to keep the Sabbath day holy.

Meanwhile, our friendship continued to grow, and our children developed great friendships as well.  A few days ago, this sweet friend sent me another text….

She had 7 free tickets for our entire family to go to Disney World on Monday, January 6th!!!!  (Baby Jayden would be free.)

I of course accepted full-heartedly!!

Our children still do not know about our plans- all they know is that tomorrow morning they are going somewhere VERY SPECIAL.  They have guessed Disney World a few times with GREAT hopes.  Each time I said, "Really guys??  We can't even afford a house- what makes you think we can afford a trip to Disney World?" :-)

Our dear friend will accompany us into Disney World to get us all in… but first she gets to be the one to make the special announcement about where we are spending our day!!  I am certain a ton of screams, squeals, and giant hugs will be involved when she breaks the wonderful news about the special gift she has been preparing for us for the past 4 months. :-)

Guess what?  Jackson's birthday and her twin sons' birthdays are all on January 7th- the day after our Disney World trip.  Jackson turns 12-years old on Tuesday and will be receiving the priesthood as a Deacon in our church on the following Sunday.  (The 12th birthday is a highly anticipated and very special one in our church.)

Instead of using the valuable tickets for her own children, she is giving our family all the tickets she has so that we can go to Disney World as a family.  My heart is touched.  My heart is full of gratitude.  What a birthday party for Jackson!! What a sacrifice she has made!!

As we celebrate our truly special and Christlike child, Jackson, I am touched that he is honored by a gift from such a truly special and Christlike woman…. my dear friend.  This gift has been four months in the making, and we will be forever grateful for it.

We are grateful to God and grateful to our dear friend.